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A Trip that wasn't

Chapter 1: The driver that wasn’t The name implies that a driver must know how to drive but driving alone doesn’t help, if a driver doesn’t know how to drive to a given location. In our case, the location was Mulshi Dam-near Pune. Our trip to Pune via Mulshi Dam was spoiled when the driver started asking us the directions to Mulshi. Chapter 2: The Chevrolet Tavera that wasn’t Of all the Taveras present in this world, we were the chosen ones to have the black smoke coughing, powerless, pickup-less, Chevrolet Tavera. After somehow reaching Lonavala, when we headed towards Mulshi, we came across a steep hill. We all were excited, but our Tavera had different plans. It didn’t seem to like the steep hill so much, and it gave up. So our trip and the Tavera took a U-turn back to Lonavala. Interval: The License that wasn’t We experienced God in Lonavala. As though we didn’t know that our driver wasn’t driver enough, Almighty God himself sent us a cherub in khaki pants and...

The Dirty Post

You say it a dozen times and yet do not mind repeating it for the thirteenth time. You shamelessly say some words in English which when deciphered may sound hilariously and ridiculously funny. “Oh Shit!” we say that in English. Try saying the same in your mother tongue and you will realize that you are talking Shit. The F-word follows the same. The usage of the F-word is so f****** common that people don’t give a shit about what the word F*** actually means. If our bosses are assholes they must definitely be speaking shit!  If everything in the world is bullshit, the smell must be awful. Does that mean that we do not think as much in English as we think in our mother tongue? I wonder how words with the same meaning have different decency levels when it comes to the language in which we utter the word. So the next time you enthrone anybody with words like bastard, swine, son of a pig, think twice! - Just kidding, don’t give a shit! If somebody is an asshole he’d...

The Attacks Of 26/11 - Reviewed

WHEN THE SILVER SCREEN TURNED RED      The Attacks of 26/11 is not a movie that should be evaluated by its star ratings. This movie pays homage to the innocent people and the brave policemen who were killed in the horrendous attacks on Mumbai by ten brainwashed men with grenades and AK-47s in their hands.      The movie demonstrates the state of mind of the then-Joint Commissioner of Police Rakesh Maria as the attacks were taking place. Director Ram Gopal Varma does not bother going into the details. He reduces the attacks at Oberoi and Nariman House to dialogues. How could he skip the NSG operations?      Ram Gopal Varma shows idols of God at places where the attacks took place as though he is challenging the mere existence of God. Nana Patekar delivers a power-packed performance. His aggravated emotions in the scene where he explains Islam and Jihad to Kasab are sure to leave you gnashing your teeth against the evil killer...

फाय स्टार टपरी

         महेश बाबुराव भोसले आणि विशाखा गणेश सहस्त्रबुद्धे यांची प्रेम प्रकरणाची सुरुवात झाली मुंबईच्या प्रत्येक आय. टी कंपन्यांच्या बाहेर असणाऱ्या टपर्यावर. या निळ्या ताडपत्राखाली टेबल-खुर्ची असलेल्या रस्त्यावरच्या हॉटेल ला टपरी म्हणता येणार नाही पण तिथे लावलेला बोर्ड “फाय स्टार टपरी” असाच म्हणतो. त्या आय. टी कंपन्याच्या अवती पांडुरंग फडके महाविध्यालय व भवती न्यू-इंग्लिश हाय स्कूल अशी दोन ज्ञानभंडार होती. या कथेला आय. टीची भणक लागले ते फक्त एवढेच.      इयत्ता ‘अकरावी ब’ चा महेश दररोज सकाळी ९ वाजता शाळा सुरु होण्यापूर्वी टपर्यावर चहा आणि बन-मस्का खातो. खाता-खाता टपरीवाला रहीमशी गप्पा मारतो. एक दिवशी बन-मस्का खातांना या कथेची नायिका अर्थात Standard ‘9 th C’ ची विशाखा तिथे आली. तिने एक बन-मस्का मागितला. सगळ्या खुर्च्या भरल्या होत्या म्हणून रहीमने महेशला उठून विशाखाला जागा देण्यासाठी सांगितले पण ज्या क्षणापासून त्या टपर्यावर विशाखा अवतरली, अगदी त्याच क्षणापासून विशाखाच्या महिमेत महेश  दंग  झाला होता. त्याला कशाचाही भान नव्हता....

A Boy named Alcohol

This boy is petite but perilous. His eyes are red. He has a big belly. He has a lungful of dirty air which smells foul.  Everyone knows this little boy. His name is Alcohol. He belongs to the family of killers. This little boy mesmerizes you, enters your body and makes you behave as he desires. This kid is carefree, emotional, expressive, fun-loving, and obstinate. He is still learning to walk so he makes it difficult even for you to balance yourself on this giant ball called Earth which is rotating at a speed of 1670 kilometers/hour! This boy is moody. Sometimes he likes to go crazy and dance wild and sometimes he just gets emotional over a trivial issue that did not go your way – He will cry and sing songs. He feels that he is the best singer or the best performer in the world. He hates everything and loves anything. He swears the whole world and asks for forgiveness. This little boy also has adult fantasies. Driving is just another game for him. He likes girls...

Matru ki Bijlee ka Mandola (2013): Reviewed

Matru ki Bijlee ka Banjo Banjo Matru ki Bijlee ka Mandola is a satire that reveals the atrocities of the Rulers - the Politicians - the Powerful - the System. It brings out the the poignant state of the farmers – how they are forced to sell off their lands to the Government at lower than market rates only to give it to bad  businessmen like Harry Mandola a.k.a Mandola(Pankaj Kapoor) who will earn huge money by developing malls, factories and housing projects on that land. Chaudari Devi (Shabana Azmi) is the corrupt bureaucrat. She will help Mandola earn the farmers land so that the Mandola will share the profits with her. Mandola is addicted to Gulabo (name of the beer he drinks). His daughter Bijlee Mandola (Anushka Sharma) is fed up of him. Hukkam Singh  Matru (Imran Khan) secretly plays the saviour of the farmers – Mao Tse-Tung. He likes Bijlee (by the way each one of us will like stunning Anushka Sharma) but never confesses.  Director Vishal Bharadwa...

Balak-Palak (2013): Reviewed

Baryachda Paha (BP) || Su-sangati sada ghado su-jan vakya kani pado Kalank Maticha zado Vishay sarvatha navdo Sadanghri-Kamali dado Muradita Hatane ado Viyog ghadata rado Man bhavccharritri Jado Gurur bramha Gurur Vishnu Gurur devo Maheshwara Gurur  sakshat parabramha Tasmai shrigurve namah a || The story set in the mid 1980’s  is about four inquisitive teenagers - Avya , Chiu , Dolly , Bhagya . In their quest to find the answers to the questions their parents fail to retort, they find a sexually enlightened Vishu who is almost the same age . Vishu tutors the four protagonists with adult books and adult movies (BP). The  curiousity to know more makes these kids grow older  in a very small age. Many funny scenes including how these guys read those books, make arrangements to watch the movie, getting almost caught, fall in love with a 22 year old (Sai Tamhankar plays a bold chatacter once again after No Entry (2012)) makes it a fantastic rib-tickli...